Cicada Files Archives: May 11, 2004

Gross Encounters of the X Kind

Tuesday, May 11, 2004 @ 9 PM

I had my first encounter with a member of the Brood X Cicada family.  I live on the outskirts of the Patapsco State Park, so I’m sure that the cicadas in my area will be rolling like P.Diddy’s entourage in a few weeks.  However, it’s still pretty early in the Brood X season, so I didn’t expect to see a cicada this soon.

On Tuesday evening, I stopped at a gas station on Security Boulevard to buy gas.  (I had to take out a second mortgage on the house just to fill up my gas tank…but that’s a whole ‘nother saga).  As I was walking towards the pump, it happened.  This huge bug landed on my right shoulder!  It looked to be about the size of a 4-year-old child…I kid you not!  Okay, so it wasn’t 3-feet tall, but it was way too big to be flying around!  I don’t know if the thing was lost and needed directions to the park, or if God was exercising his sense of humor, but it picked the WRONG shoulder to land on.

For a minute there, I tried to lay aside my fear of insects, and tried to play it cool.  I thought if I could simply brush it off my shoulder, I’d be okay.  My first instinct was to scream, but I was trying to handle it rationally.  So I started flicking at the thing, and then I proceeded to stomp my foot; the bug didn’t move.  I yelled at the bug; it didn’t move.  After exhausting all possible options, I had no choice.  I had to scream.  And you know what?  The bug still didn’t move.  It took a little twisting and turning, and a lot of screaming for the bug to eventually fall to the ground.

A couple of other customers at the gas station asked me if I was okay.  I think one lady was laughing at me as she was pulling off.  But trust me, that sister will have her day.  I was so freaked out by this bug landing on me, that I quickly put the cap back on the tank, hopped in the car and sped off.

As a result of my experience, I’ve come up with a few tips to help people cope with the Brood X Cicadas:

  1. Don’t buy gas from the Shell station on Security Boulevard. This is a cicada-friendly establishment.
  2. Don’t waste your energy trying to yell at, or reason with a cicada. Cicadas don’t understand English.
  3. Don’t move near a state park. Parks tend to have a lot of trees, and cicadas like trees. Hence, where there are trees, there will be lots of cicadas and mass pandemonium.
  4. If a cicada lands on your shoulder, you can easily get it off by turning in a circle twice counter-clockwise while screaming loudly. This will effectively make the cicada dizzy and will scare it (along with anyone within 30 feet of you).

 In the coming weeks, as the cicadas sneak out of the Patapsco State Park and start roaming through my neighborhood, I’m sure I’ll come up more reasonable and rational tips to pass along.

Cicada Non Grata

 

I don’t know who told the Brood X Cicadas that they could just show up unannounced four years early. But whoever it is, they will have hell to pay. It’s 2017, and those beady-eyed flying terrors of destruction were not due back here for another four years. I needed those four years to come up with an escape plan.

Anyone who knows me know that I am not a cicada fan. And anyone who knows me well knows that I had a little blog called The Cicada Files back during the last Brood X invasion.

As I will be spending a lot of time indoors over the next several weeks, I’ll be sharing posts from The Cicada Files archives here.

Damn you, Cicadas.

Book Recommendation: THE TRUTH ABOUT AWITI

Muse

aWITI

“[I]f one believes–or at a minimum has a bit of curiosity–regarding the connection between the mind, body, and spirit, specifically as it relates to traumatic experiences, the theory of spiritual retribution is difficult to ignore.” C. P. Patrick

Publisher Synopsis:

There is a commonly held belief the tropical storms and hurricanes that form off the coast of West Africa are not natural disasters, but rather they are retaliation by restless spirits impacted by one of the darkest chapters of world history—the trans–Atlantic slave trade.

Awiti’s destiny was forever changed the day the slave raiders arrived at her village. She made a life-altering decision with the hope of being reunited with her family, only to discover her effort was in vain. For centuries, her sadness raged within the winds and rain, resulting in tropical storms that devastated the South. But there is more to Awiti than creating hurricanes, as those who…

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“The Four Jesuses” Reading Postponed

4J Postponed

It all started out beautifully.

I submitted my two-act play, The Four Jesuses, to the DCBTF earlier this year. I was delighted to learn that the DCBTF chose my little play to be in the DCBTF’s 2015 New Works Reading Series! Being a first-time playwright, I was excited to have the opportunity to share my work with the theatre community.

I have been writing all my life. Poems, short stories, essays…you name it, I’ve written it. Writing a play has been something that I’ve wanted to do for some time, and finally I had.

The process of putting on a play is new to me. I was looking forward to learning about auditioning, the workshop process and what it takes to produce a play. I was excited, energized and inspired.

That was a few months ago.

Over the past few months, I have been on a roller coaster ride with this festival. My flier, logo and other promotional materials never made it onto the festival website, and no one could confirm for me the actual start time for my reading. There’s so much more I could say, and so much more proof of the foolery and ninja nonsense I have had to deal with, but I won’t get into that. I am trying to temper my words and not lay blame, but it’s hard, especially when my reputation — which is vested in this — is at stake.

Everything started to unravel at warp speed yesterday when I went to the venue for a site visit. The RISE Demonstration Center’s facilities staff advised me that they did not have a signed contract from the festival organizers, even though my fellow playwrights and I were given a schedule of dates and times for our readings. The Executive Director of the Center called me, very apologetic, and told me that without a signed contract from the festival organizers, they could not allow us to use the facilities. She graciously offered to allow us to use the outdoor pavilion instead. However, there were four readings scheduled for the same two-hour time slot on Sunday, and they’re calling for rain. So multiple readings taking place in the outdoor pavilion in the evening…in the rain? There are too many things that could go wrong with that scenario. According to some playwrights, they have gotten word from the organizers that everything’s a go for Sunday. As of this writing, I, personally, have not received such confirmation.

IMG_3033

The past 18 hours have been the most stressful and disappointing in my life. Multiple attempts to contact festival organizers have yielded nothing. And thus, after talking to my talented and supportive cast, I have decided to postpone my reading. I do not want to put anyone in any sort of physical, legal or other kind of jeopardy. I am working on scheduling an independent reading, and as soon as I have preliminary logistics locked down, I will let you all know.

I thank all of my family, friends, colleagues, fellow writers and my new friends in the DMV theater community for their love, encouragement and support. To Tawanza Anthony, Johnnie Leon Hill, Rikki Lacewell Howie, Melanie Burwell, Teneisha Brown, Quentin Briscoe and Albert Prater Jr.: Thank you for believing in me and my play to want to invest in my dream. I am humbled by your talent, dedication and support.

To quote a line from The Four Jesuses Program that I now will not be handing out tomorrow, “The late Dr. Maya Angelou once said ‘Try to be a rainbow in someone else’s cloud.’ Thank you for being rainbows in my life, and for brightening my path in so many beautiful and delightful ways.”

“The Four Jesuses” Debuting at the DC Black Theatre Festival!

I am happy, proud and excited to announce that my new play, “The Four Jesuses”, will be debuting at the 2015 DC Black Theatre Festival on Sunday, June 21st! “The Four Jesuses” is a part of the DCBTF’s New Works Reading Series. Stay tuned for more details…

The Four Jesuses flier
“The Four Jesuses”, a two-act play, will be debuting at the 2015 DC Black Theatre Festival

Writing Outside the Fence Seeks Volunteer Instructors for Fall & Winter Workshops!

Writing Outside the Fence seeks qualified, committed volunteer teachers for Fall 2014 and Winter 2015 workshops. The program offers creative writing workshops for ex-offenders and the extended community through the Reentry Center in Baltimore. We launched in May 2006 and were the cover story in the June 6, 2007 issue of City Paper. In addition, the winners of our Inmate/Ex-Offender Writing Contest were featured in the March 2009 issue of Urbanite. In June 2009 two of our writers were featured on WYPR in Tom Hall’s segment of Maryland Morning. We’ve held readings at  the Enoch Pratt Library the last several summers. A podcast of our 2012 reading is available on the library website.

The program is currently looking for volunteers to commit to a month of weekly meetings — four consecutive meetings total per teacher — for late summer into fall of 2014. The workshop meets Tuesdays, 5-7 PM at the Reentry Center at 2401 Liberty Heights Ave. on the upper level of the Mondawmin Mall in Northwest Baltimore.

Past instructors have been poets and journalists, playwrights and screenwriters, fiction and creative nonfiction writers. They have included instructors from BCCC, Coppin State, Goucher, Johns Hopkins, Loyola, MICA, the University of Baltimore, and elsewhere. No two have run their workshops quite the same way; all have found it rewarding.

If you are interested in volunteering for this worthwhile effort, contact WritingOutside [at] aol [dot] com.

Writing Outside the Fence Seeks Qualified Volunteer Teachers

Writing Outside the Fence seeks qualified, committed volunteer teachers. The program offers creative writing workshops for ex-offenders and the extended community through the Reentry Center in Baltimore. We launched in May 2006 and were the cover story in the June 6, 2007 issue of City Paper. In addition, the winners of our Inmate/Ex-Offender Writing Contest were featured in the March 2009 issue of Urbanite. In June 2009 two of our writers were featured on WYPR in Tom Hall’s segment of Maryland Morning. We’ve held readings at Enoch Pratt the last several summers. A podcast of our 2012 reading is available on the library website.

The program is currently looking for volunteers to commit to a month of weekly meetings — four consecutive meetings total per teacher — for late summer into fall of 2014. The workshop meets Tuesdays, 5-7 PM at the Reentry Center at 2401 Liberty Heights Ave. on the upper level of the Mondawmin Mall in Northwest Baltimore.Past instructors have been poets and journalists, playwrights and screenwriters, fiction and creative nonfiction writers. They have included instructors from BCCC, Coppin State, Goucher, Johns Hopkins, Loyola, MICA, the University of Baltimore, and elsewhere. No two have run their workshops quite the same way; all have found it rewarding.

If you are interested in volunteering for this worthwhile effort, contact WritingOutside [at] aol [dot] com.